Guiding the Male Lead out of His Trauma - Chapter 50.2
Mitchel, who had called us over, was visibly on edge, irritated by something else again.
At the edge of the plains.
On the first day we arrived here, he had stood on the opposite side of where we were now, clearly biting back a curse. Soon after, he kicked at a rock and spoke.
“You two, did you commit insubordination against the Crown Prince or something?”
I flinched, about to carelessly blurt out an affirmation, but Acteon answered first.
“Yes.”
At that moment, Mitchel’s eyebrows twisted furiously.
He kicked another rock and shouted.
“You insane bastards!”
The stone flew in an arc and landed somewhere out in the plains.
Mitchel kept venting his anger at nothing in particular before he burst out again.
“Do you know what kind of order just came down?! Reclaiming Mervaille was nothing compared to this. It was all because of this!”
“What’s the directive from above?”
“They’re telling me not to authorize bracelet removal! I’m talking about you, Liliope!”
The point was this.
Acteon’s mana stabilization was being denied.
I clutched my wrist, still wearing the bracelet, in disbelief.
They’re not allowing guiding? Why?
“The only ones who can stabilize you here are me, an A-Class guide, or Liliope. Just how much did you piss them off for them to hand down an order like this from up top? Do you have any idea how insane it is to operate without stabilization?!”
“But would they really forbid it completely after putting me on the front lines? They must know it’s dangerous, too.”
“Exactly. That’s why they told me to give you just enough to make a token difference! Do you expect me to hold hands with a guy like you all day?! This is no different from tossing a starving man a hunk of bread he can barely chew!”
Mitchel let out a howl of rage, like his blood was boiling.
Not stabilizing Acteon wasn’t something that directly harmed me.
But it did trigger a deep sense of guilt.
The fact that they had figured out our closeness in such a short time and were using it as a method of punishment made my stomach churn.
It was revolting.
The reality that I had to keep living under these people, suffering this kind of treatment, made me feel a deep sense of futility.
I always had a lot on my mind.
That I wanted to change this life I had no choice but to endure.
But when faced with moments like this, where it was only us who suffered, caught between the people I cared for being pressured because of me and the powers that crushed my small acts of defiance as if they were nothing.
It became hard to believe anything could ever change, and the despair threatened to blind me.
If I truly couldn’t guide, I probably would’ve collapsed right then and there.
Mitchel looked like he was about to explode again.
But seeing me frozen in place like a cracked statue, he bit back the rest of his words.
I didn’t know how Acteon was viewing me just then.
He still wore that calm expression, his lips curled in a shallow smile.
“Thank you for your concern. So I’m to maintain my current condition without stabilization for the time being, then.”
“…Right. As long as you don’t use any more mana, you should be able to manage. From now on, even if another battle breaks out, stay back.”
“I’m not so sure.”
He really didn’t know how to listen.
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
It was obvious he was politely refusing and had no intention of complying.
Mitchel glared at him like he wanted to tear him apart, then grumbled and walked off.
Once he was out of sight, I grabbed Acteon’s wrist firmly.
“Senior?”
“Acteon. Come with me.”
There was no point hiding it anymore.
He had once told me that my problems were his own.
And I didn’t want to become a coward who ignored someone who had been dragged into the battlefield because of me.
At the edge of Mervaille, there was a small birch grove, too small to call a forest.
Instead of heading back to the barracks, I led him there, tightening my grip on his hand.
“Why are you acting so recklessly without understanding how dangerous this is?”
“It’s not reckless. I only said what I said because I’m prepared to deal with it.”
“You seriously… it’s like you’re desperate to make me take responsibility for you.”
“You’re not wrong. Somehow, it feels like it really has to be you, Senior.”
Even if he hadn’t said that, I was already thinking about him far too much.
‘No, I’m going crazy thinking about him.’
If this was his way of tying my gaze to him, then he had succeeded without a doubt.
I had to admit it.
Acteon Brondearn had entered my world.
And if this kept up, I would end up taking full responsibility for him.
“Because you’ve had to endure this humiliation with me, I’m putting my life in your hands, too.”
What I was about to do now was part of that.
The bracelet, which had long since been unlocked, dropped silently onto a pile of fallen leaves.
I wrapped his hand in both of mine and brought his fingertips to my lips.
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