Idol of the Heavenly One - vanish into fiction

That was the celebrity’s share. That it was part of the path I chose.

But…… did it really have to be that way? Somewhere in my chest, a very faint, yet distinct cracking sound echoed. Until now, I had thought of the fans’ love as a single mass. Something large and warm. Something like a blanket wrapping around me.

But in reality, countless different textures were mixed within it. Smooth ones, rough ones, and sharp ones. The fact that the emotion of liking someone, the belief that the person must therefore listen to their words, and the twisted logic that I must be punished if I fail to meet expectations could all exist within the same boundaries. That reality was so vivid, which made it all the more terrifying.

Suddenly, the moments of looking down at the fans from the stage flashed through my mind. The shining lightsticks, the tearful faces, the voices calling out my name. There was no way those scenes were a lie. A large portion of those countless sights was undoubtedly real. That was why my mind became even more complicated. I love my fans. That is not a lie. If they hadn’t been there at the stage, I wouldn’t have run so breathlessly, nor would I even be alive.

Yet at the same time, I fully realized with my entire body only today that this love could turn its direction at any moment. That love turns into expectation, expectation into demand, demand into control, and when control faces frustration, it can turn into violence. I could be an existence that helps someone endure their day, but I could also be an excuse to justify someone’s distorted emotions. That fact was so overwhelming that all the cheering suddenly felt a bit distant.

Even so, I know. I know that this train of thought will not lead to the conclusion of ‘therefore, I dislike fans.’ I know it. Those kinds of fans are just a small part, and the majority are good, the majority will not harm me. I still want to hear the fans’ cheers, and I want to receive love from them. However, I have also come to realize that I can no longer embrace all of it unconditionally like before. I felt that I needed to distinguish more clearly from now on exactly how much of it is my share, and at which point it crosses the line. That part was sad. The fact that I have to maintain a certain distance just to protect this love.

“Are you okay?”

“……No.”

I barely managed to shake my head while held in Baek Jae-heon’s embrace. To the question of whether I was okay, I couldn’t bring myself to say yes. Because I wasn’t okay. I became scared. A moment had finally come where my job, my very existence—which had been so wonderful and happy up until just a moment ago—felt utterly terrifying.

“……I think I need to rest for a bit.”

***

[Deokdam] YEARZ Cheonmyeong attacked by a fan disguised as a staff member… temporary suspension of activities.

Author | Choksae

(Full Text of Article) An incident occurred where Cheonmyeong, a member of the boy group YEARZ, was attacked by a fan who had disguised themselves as a staff member. It has been reported that the incident in question took place on site during the final day of the solo concert, which was the first one held by YEARZ since the release of their studio album.

The agency stated, “Cheonmyeong has sustained no physical injuries, but the psychological shock resulting from the incident that occurred right after the conclusion of the concert is considerable,” and added, “In accordance with the opinions of the medical staff and professional counselors, he plans to temporarily suspend all activities for the time being to focus entirely on rest and recovery.”

Currently, the police are investigating the details of the incident, and the agency shared, “Placing the artist’s protection as our highest priority, we will completely re-examine the on-site security system and proceed with strict legal actions against the perpetrator.”

[Comments: 9,999]

-GoguryeoSillaBaekJaeheon: Hul

-GogumaSinsaBaekJaeheon: Hul

-GiveIripANamePlease: Insane

-OnThisTrashLikeIsland: Ah…….

-YuanNoGuiltMuanGuilt: Hul…….

-GoHeeMinUntil70: No, this is insane

-DeleteEnterKeyPlease: Does this even make sense? On the last day of the concert? On a day that should be happier than any other, does this seriously make any sense… No, how on earth is CZ managing the site security, sigh seriously……

-SweetCornShow: If Ji Myeong-hyeon retires because of this, I seriously won’t be able to go on, in all honesty, please……

-BettingMyLifeOnYEARZ: If it were me, forget a temporary suspension, I would just straight up retire. What is with this, incidents haven’t stopped constantly ever since the debut.

└ExperiencedRookie: For real, Ji Myeong-hyeon seriously needs to get an exorcism ritual done or something.

-IsItAFoxOrACat: Oh please ㅠㅠㅠㅠㅠ Is he hurt????

└LoveCannotBeHidden: I don’t think he’s hurt physically ㅠㅠ Seeing how they say there are no physical injuries but the psychological shock is considerable ㅠㅠ Oh please, Myeong-hyeon-ah ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

-MyLifeIsOver: My life is seriously over.