Idol of the Heavenly One - vanish into fiction

The air in the room was already thick with tension, making it hard to breathe. Baek Jae-heon’s last words washed over me like a wave, pulling me in while also making me feel like I was being dragged down to the depths.

“…So, what do you want then?”

I managed to ask, my voice weak but sincere. I truly wanted to know.

Baek Jae-heon’s gaze, fixed on my face, was intense. His seemingly indifferent eyes were too deep and unfamiliar, like an abyss I could never reach.

“I don’t want anything.”

I couldn’t understand anything. I didn’t know what he felt for me, what he wanted to do with me, nothing was clear.

“You just need to be like this.”

Yet, instinctively, I felt it. Baek Jae-heon wasn’t treating me lightly. Instead, he was holding me tightly, impossibly close.

“I don’t understand anything…”

My voice trembled. Honestly, I didn’t understand anything. I just wanted to confirm the excitement I felt after 69 years. If asked if I wanted to label this as love, yes, I did. It might seem childish to others, but it was my first and most precious feeling. So, I desperately wanted to confirm that we felt the same way.

“Tell me…”

But Baek Jae-heon was… too deep. Was it scary? Of course not. It was so good that I wanted to drown in it. But if he didn’t put it into words, that overwhelming feeling would soon turn into fear. I was still clumsy, despite my age, when it came to interpreting my own feelings.

…

I revealed my eagerness to know, but Baek Jae-heon remained silent. That silence both increased my anxiety and, at the same time, his gentle embrace soothed my negative feelings.

I didn’t ask any more questions. Yes, whatever it was, it didn’t matter. For now, this was enough. Being in his arms, feeling the strength of his embrace, was more than enough for this moment.

“Can we do it again…”

I tilted my head slightly and asked Baek Jae-heon if we could kiss again. He chuckled softly and, like he did in the Aseudae waiting room, gently bumped his head against mine.

“Never kissed before?”

“Uh…”

“Never mind, don’t say it.”

Baek Jae-heon asked playfully, then suddenly turned serious, frowning. ‘Why is he doing this?’ I wondered, but I didn’t really want to respond. If I did, the only answer would be, ‘Yes.’

So, was he asking to kiss again, or to touch? I swallowed hard, fidgeting with the collar of his shirt. I wanted more. Even after doing this for nearly fifty minutes, I wanted fifty, a hundred, no, five hundred more minutes like this.

“…Let’s do it.”

So, I begged to kiss again. But Baek Jae-heon, as if surprisingly, widened his eyes and looked at me with a slightly serious expression.

“What?”

What, really? I thought, surprised. We had just been at it for fifty minutes, so what was there to be surprised about?

“…”

Seeing my expression, Baek Jae-heon seemed to be deep in thought. Then, suddenly, he grabbed my hand and pulled me closer, placing it on the front of his pants.

“Hey, hey…”

I tried to pull my arm away, startled, but his grip was too strong. I had a feeling we might have sex, or something similar, but I wasn’t expecting him to be so aggressive. I wasn’t mentally prepared yet.

As I struggled to free my hand, a soft laugh from Baek Jae-heon echoed above me. Wondering why he was laughing, I looked up, and his lips immediately captured mine again.

Surprised by the sudden kiss, I quickly adjusted, no longer just receiving his tongue but exploring his teeth. But I was still clumsy. I focused only on his mouth, while Baek Jae-heon teased me by pulling away and pressing in, heightening my excitement. Why was he so good at this? I felt a pang of jealousy, but that thought quickly vanished.